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Dangerously Ever After
Not all princesses are made of sugar and spice--some are made of funnier, fiercer stuff Princess Amanita laughs in the face of danger. Brakeless bicycles, pet scorpions, spiky plants--that's her thing. So when quiet Prince Florian gives her roses, Amanita is unimpressed . . . until she sees their glorious thorns! Now she must have rose seeds of her own. But when huge, honking noses grow instead, what is a princess with a taste for danger to do? For readers seeking a princess with pluck comes an independent heroine who tackles obstacles with a bouquet of sniffling noses. At once lovely and delightfully absurd, here's a story to show how elastic ideas of beauty and princesses can be.
The End of Everything Forever
Fallen gods. Cloned queens. Psychokinetic squirrels. Atomic werewolves. Hippie zombies. Jell-O monsters. Butter monsters. Booger monsters. An army of philosophers bent on world domination. A cybernetically-enhanced donut maker. The horned-up ghosts of elderly lady serial killers. The frozen head of Walt Sidney. Earthquakes. Fire tornados. A global volcanic winter. A supermassive extradimensional black hole. Dr. Vanilla Ice II. And that's literally not even the half of it. Five books. Seventeen stories. More f-bombs than Microsoft Word can count. Ten years of EXPONENTIAL APOCALYPSE are collected into a single volume, an omnibus that, like a stoner's rug, ties everything together, from the fir...
The Marriage
Ten years ago he killed my son. Today I married him.Ten years ago my darling son Jesse was murdered and our perfect family was destroyed. My strong, handsome boy, so full of life, became a memory, a photo I carried with me everywhere.But today I'm finally close to finding happiness again. My ash-blonde hair has been curled into ringlets. Carefully placed white flowers frame my delicate features. The small, drab chapel has been prettied up with white satin, and there are tiny red hearts scattered on the small table where I will soon sign the register with my new husband.The man who killed my son.My friends and family can't understand it. My neighbours whisper in the street whenever I walk pas...
The Devil's Promise
San Antonio is full of secrets, and seventeen-year-old Erasmo Cruz investigates the strangest of them. After gaining renown for surviving the city's legendary Ghost Tracks, he has set up shop as a paranormal investigator. But helping exorcize other people’s demons doesn’t seem to relieve his own; his best friend Rat has abandoned him, his grandmother is nearing death, and his own health has taken a sudden decline. None of these hardships can prepare Erasmo for the story his newest client brings him. Two decades after a strange ritual at a rural ranch, Bradley Erickson is being hunted by the Devil. In exchange for the life of his dreams, Bradley must surrender the blood of his child. The case hurls Erasmo into a dark web of cults, bargains, and broken pasts. Only one thing is certain: the Devil keeps his promises.
Mouth
About MOUTH: Screenwriter Joshua Hull (Glorious) makes his longform prose debut! After a stranger leaves him a secluded property, drifter Rusty finds himself the caretaker of a massive, tooth-filled mouth in the ground…and it’s hungry. His situation is complicated by Abigail, a wannabe filmmaker who stumbles on the secret. Together, the odd pair set out to discover the origins of Mouth and the hidden history of its former owner, setting in motion an outlandish scheme that could endanger them all. Cover art by Halil Karasu. Interior illustrations by Kristofor Harris. "The definitive modern day grotto grotesquerie, mincing Herschell Gordon Lewis with Hunter S. Thompson into an amuse-bouche...
From the Belly
The whaling vessel Merciful has just made its strangest catch yet: a massive whale containing a still-living man secreted within its stomach lining. Sailor Isaiah Chase is tasked with keeping the enigmatic man alive. As their relationship grows, a series of accidents, injuries and deaths quickly befall the ship and its crew. Isaiah is plagued by strangely prophetic dreams, even as the crew continues their endless quest for whale oil under the command of an increasingly unhinged captain. As events spiral further out of control, the mysterious man confesses what Isaiah has begun to suspect: the crew of The Merciful has fallen into a cycle of punishment for their greed and destruction. Isaiah must confront the sea's vengeance made flesh, and choose between this new, strange love and the fate of the ship itself.
TRVE CVLT
A Choose Your Own Adventure...but New Weird Horror? We Got you. Tenebrous Press' first gamebook is a meta-exploration of religious trauma, arrested adolescence and anxiety…and it's Metal as F$%k. You wake with a brutal hangover, but that can't crush your spirits: you've been invited to take back the drum throne for Abyss, the cult band you co-founded! It means quashing a turbulent history with Abyss' vocalist, Austin. You aren't sure if he's invited you back to bury the hatchet, or if he's just desperate because infamous black metal legends Waste Doctrine are rolling through town. They've given you the opportunity to open for them and maybe, finally, get the hell out of this nowhere town. The promise of the upcoming gig doesn't come without its share of hurdles. Austin's hellbent on creating a ritualistic experience out of the performance, turning the abandoned roadhouse he's chosen as a venue into a bloody, occult nightmare. Yes, it's black f$%king metal, but is it too far? Only you can decide. Get the gig. Ditch this town. Burn them all alive.
The Unforgiven
It is late at night when Detective Jacob Striker receives a call to investigate a disturbance at a bus depot in downtown Vancouver. On arrival, he discovers a bus in flames and the fire department battling to control the blaze. When they finally put the fire out, Striker makes a terrifying discovery. Inside is the body of a woman he once worked with, a police officer from the force. It looks as though she has been lured in and ambushed. Striker vows to avenge the death of his friend and colleague by bringing her murderer to justice, and to start, he'll have to take over the file she was investigating that brought her to this part of the city. But the more Striker tries to look into the case, the more he finds doors closed in his face - both among the police and outside. It soon becomes apparent that Jazz's investigations were upsetting some influential people, and Striker is putting himself in grave danger as he battles through the layers of intrigue and lies surrounding the case.
We Have Always Lived in the Break Room
Wahl’ter Dinsdale has been the master accountant for the tribe of the break-room for many seasons. He has secured the sacred vending machines against all attackers. He has skinned the mighty naugahyde sofa. He has mastered the art of the spreadsheet. But even he is not prepared when strange rumors reach the tribe of an unsettling phenomenon - a window, opened to another world outside the office. Now, with his friends: vicious administrative warrior Jo’see, and Bertram the Train-or, he sets out on a quest to find the source of the unrest. But Wahl’ter will have to make his way through all the tribes in the building first, from the HR wraiths to the sorcerers of marketing, and this office meeting will not end with cake and coffee, but with violence.
A Spectre is Haunting Greentree
REAP WHAT YOU SOW In the wake of a series of panic attacks, isolated and introverted Carina takes a friend up on an offer: go to Greentree, Oregon, escape her abusive ex, and start a new life. But upon arrival, the town is stranger than Carina could have ever imagined. For one, they still have a video store. For two, everyone is rich. For three, what’s up with all these scarecrows? As Greentree’s secrets begin to unravel, as the autumn sun bends below the corn, as scythes sharpen in the night—a violent revolution stirs. Cover art by Stefan Koidl. Interior illustrations by Matt Blairstone. “Intriguing and a helluva lot of fun. Winter delivers so much more than the reader expects. I f$...
