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Mulligans, holes-in-one, men vs. women, impossible shots... the best way to deal with your golf addiction is to laugh at it: * One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very sheer nightie. ''Tie me up,'' she purred, ''and you can do anything you want.'' So he tied her up and went golfing. * Did you hear the one about the wife who got hit in the head with a golf ball on the first hole and died? The husband was so distraught he only played the front nine. * Q: What's the difference between a car and a golf ball? A: Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards. * Wife: You think so much about your golf game you don't even remember when we were married. Husband: Of course I do, dear. It was the day I sank that thirty-foot putt. * The difference between golf and tennis is that tennis is murder -- you just want to kill the other player -- but golf is suicide -- you just want to kill yourself.
Grade level: 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, e, i, s.
When it comes to our beloved ''good ol' hockey game,'' humour abounds in Canada. The Hockey Joke Book shows you just how funny the sport, its teams and its toothless players can be: * Q: What do the Ottawa Senators and the Titanic have in common? A: They both look good until they hit the ice! * Q: What's the difference between the Calgary Flames and a bra? A: A bra has two cups! * Four out of five dentists surveyed recommend playing hockey. * Plus so much more hilarity!
Which Canadian hockey player scored the most goals in his NHL career? Which goaltender racked up the most shut-outs? Who was the first woman to register a point in a professional men's hockey game? This new book answers these hockey trivia questions and m
This upstart hockey champion from Cole Harbour, Nova Scotia, has led a seemingly charmed life, garnering awards and firsts since he learned to skate at age three: * He is the captain of the Pittsburgh Penguins--the youngest player in history to be named such -- and has led his team to its first Stanley Cup since 1992 * In his first season Crosby became the youngest player in NHL history to score 100 points in a season * He became the youngest player in NHL history to score 200 points overall * Crosby was the youngest player to win the Art Ross Trophy for the most goals scored in a season in 2007 * After a suffering crushing defeat by the Red Wings in 2008, Captain Crosby led his Penguins through a tough season, an intense playoff and past those same Red Wings in the finals to win the 2009 Stanley Cup Championship, but they could not repeat in 2010 * A collective cheer went up from an entire country when Crosby scored in overtime of the gold medal game at the 2010 Vancouver Olympics to help Canada to its 14th gold, a record number of gold medals by any country in the history of the Winter Games.
Multi-dollar arenas, gold-level seating, $7,00 beer and hockey players groomed since birth -- this is the reality of professional hockey today. But Canadian hockey culture wasn't always this way. Sportswriter J Alexander Poulton has written a panoramix account of the history of the game, starting with hockey's humble beginnings when a few players knocked a puck around with no rules, no jerseys, not even a referee.
The greatest, funniest and most memorable phrases in hockey history: * ''I get paid for the practices. I'd play the games for nothing.'' Tim Horton, former Toronto Maple Leafs defenseman * ''When we've got the puck, they can't score.'' Paul Coffey, former Edmonton Oilers forward * ''We get nose jobs all the time in the NHL, and we don't even have to go to the hospital.'' Brad Park, former Detroit Red Wings defenseman * ''Hockey players can walk on water.'' Unknown * ''How would you like a job where every time you make a mistake, a big red light goes on and 18,000 people boo?'' Jacques Plante, former Montreal Canadiens goaltender * ''I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out.'' Rodney Dangerfield, comedian * ''You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take.'' Wayne Gretzky, ''The Great One'' * ''Remember, keep your stick on the ice.'' Steve Smith, a.k.a. Red Green * ''I've got nothing to say, and I'm only going to say it once!'' Floyd Smith, former Toronto Maple Leafs head coach * And many more.
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A Marginal Revolution Book of the Year After tracking the lives of thousands of people from birth to midlife, four of the world’s preeminent psychologists reveal what they have learned about how humans develop. Does temperament in childhood predict adult personality? What role do parents play in shaping how a child matures? Is day care bad—or good—for children? Does adolescent delinquency forecast a life of crime? Do genes influence success in life? Is health in adulthood shaped by childhood experiences? In search of answers to these and similar questions, four leading psychologists have spent their careers studying thousands of people, observing them as they’ve grown up and grown ol...