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Defining the narcissistic/borderline couple as "individuals who, when they are together, form a shared couple myth that gives rise to many collective fantasies," Lachkar explicates the network that underlies this type of relationship and demonstrates how two theoretical constructs--self psychology and object relations--can be integrated to create an effective conjoint treatment of marital pathology. Annotation copyrighted by Book News, Inc., Portland, OR
Much has been written about narcissism, addressing not only its theoretical aspects, its psychodynamics and the defense mechanisms within the spectrum of various kinds of narcissists. Yet, little if anything has been written about how to actually communicate with one, or what Lachkar refers to as the “Language of Empathology.” This book focuses on specific communication styles in addressing patients with severe narcissistic personality pathology which can be extremely beneficial to mental health professionals, who are often inundated with technical terms rather than offered a practical guide on how to actually "talk" to a narcissist. How to Talk to a Narcissist is designed to be a guide useful to both beginning and seasoned practitioners. The book is recommended to all clinicians treating individuals, couples, groups, within the scope of various narcissistic personality disorders. The book has many applications, including use as a textbook for universities, clinics, graduate courses, and analytic training institutes. People in business, partnerships, commercial sales, and human resources will also find the approach to communicating with a narcissist most valuable.
In How to Talk to a Borderline, Joan Lachkar introduces Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and outlines the challenges and difficulties it presents to clinicians. She expands current understanding of BPD by outlining eight different kinds of borderline personality disorders and how each of these requires specific communication techniques and methods. Case examples are offered throughout the text and in some cases describe the kinds of partners borderlines attract. This book offers new approaches to communicating, working with, and treating borderline personality disorders while integrating more contemporary treatment methods.
Everyone knows what the "G-spot" is, of course. It is a woman's most sensitive and vulnerable physical area. Although men do not have a G-spot per se, both men and women have what Joan Lachkar calls a "V-spot"—a concentration of highly charged emotional sensitivities emanating from early childhood experiences that remain raw and unhealed. These experiences might involve the parent who abandoned the child at an early age, the mother who smothered the child with too much affection, or the child who was neglected and never touched or soothed. Another source can be a parent or caretaker who drills the message into the child, "You're not good enough, not deserving enough, too demanding," etc. F...
The Disappearing Male by Joan Lachkar, PhD, provides psychoanalytic/psychodynamic descriptions of eight different kinds of men who "disappear" from relationships seemingly without warning or explanation. This book can help to assist the women affected in recognizing the danger...
Some readers may recognize their mothers as well as themselves in this book. They will also find specific suggestions for creating healthier relationships. Addressing the adult children of borderlines and the therapists who work with them, Dr. Lawson shows how to care for the waif without rescuing her, to attend to the hermit without feeding her fear, to love the queen without becoming her subject, and to live with the witch without becoming her victim.
The Stories We Tell Ourselves: Mentalizing Tales of Dating and Marriage is about the dynamics of intimate interpersonal relationships (dating and marriage) - how and why human pairings occur, what helps them function optimally and how therapists can intervene when they don't. J. Mark Thompson and Richard Tuch employ a multidimensional perspective that provides a variety of "lenses" through which intimate relationships can be viewed. The authors also offer a new model of couples therapy based on the mentalization model of treatment developed by Peter Fonagy and his colleagues. This book is aimed at those interested in the nature of intimate relationships as well as those wishing to expand the...
The subject is emotional abuse—the ongoing process whereby one person attempts to destroy the will, needs, desires, or perceptions of another. The object is the well-educated, high-functioning professional woman. Dr. Joan Lachkar examines the origins and early warning signs of the psychological violation she describes as a dance between abuser and abused. She goes on to introduce typologies of each (the narcissistic or passive-aggressive abuser, the unentitled self) and to explore the bases for their collusive attachments. Addressing therapeutic functions like empathy, containment, and countertransference, and following a couple's evolution from a state of fusion through transitional two-ness to emerging separateness, dependent and interdependent, Dr. Lachkar applies her psychodynamic approach to treatment, informed by object relations and self psychology, and complete with guidelines for technique and practical suggestions for the couple.
Much has been written about narcissism, addressing not only its theoretical aspects, its psychodynamics and the defense mechanisms within the spectrum of various kinds of narcissists. Yet, little if anything has been written about how to actually communicate with one, or what Lachkar refers to as the “Language of Empathology.” This book focuses on specific communication styles in addressing patients with severe narcissistic personality pathology which can be extremely beneficial to mental health professionals, who are often inundated with technical terms rather than offered a practical guide on how to actually "talk" to a narcissist. How to Talk to a Narcissist is designed to be a guide useful to both beginning and seasoned practitioners. The book is recommended to all clinicians treating individuals, couples, groups, within the scope of various narcissistic personality disorders. The book has many applications, including use as a textbook for universities, clinics, graduate courses, and analytic training institutes. People in business, partnerships, commercial sales, and human resources will also find the approach to communicating with a narcissist most valuable.
In this second edition of her groundbreaking book, Dr. Joan Lachkar addresses the ever-changing faces and phases of narcissism within the context of marital therapy and discusses the new developments in the treatment of marital conflict. Drawing from many different theoretical frameworks, mainly self-psychology (Kohut) and object relations (Klein), the works of D.W, Winnicott, and Kernberg are expanded to further explain why couples stay in painful, conflictual, never-ending relationships (traumatic bonding). The new chapters, case illustrations, and updated treatment sequences are invaluable to both beginning and experienced clinicians. The Narcissistic / Borderline Couple is an essential text for every marital therapist, offering an improved understanding of marital pathology within the framework of our changing world.