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My name is David Wong. My best friend is John. Those names are fake. You might want to change yours. You may not want to know about the things you'll read on these pages, about the sauce, about Korrock, about the invasion, and the future. But it's too late. You touched the book. You're in the game. You're under the eye. The only defence is knowledge. You need to read this book, to the end. Even the part about the bratwurst. Why? You'll just have to trust me. Unfortunately for us, if you make the right choice, we'll have a much harder time explaining how to fight off the otherwordly invasion currently threatening to enslave humanity. I'm sorry to have involved you in this, I really am. But as you read about these terrible events and the very dark epoch the world is about to enter as a result, it is crucial you keep one thing in mind: NONE OF THIS IS MY FAULT...
From the writer of the cult sensation John Dies at the End comes another terrifying and hilarious tale of almost Armageddon at the hands of two hopeless heroes. It's the story "They" don't want you to read. Though, to be fair, "They" are probably right about this one. No, don't put the book back on the shelf – it is now your duty to purchase it to prevent others from reading it. Yes, it works with ebooks, too; I don't have time to explain how. While investigating a fairly straightforward case of a shape-shifting interdimensional child predator, Dave, John, and Amy realized there might actually be something weird going on. Together, they navigate a diabolically convoluted maze of illusions, lies, and their own incompetence in an attempt to uncover a terrible truth that they - like you - would be better off not knowing. Your first impulse will be to think that a story this gruesome – and, to be frank, stupid – cannot possibly be true. That is precisely the reaction "They" are hoping for.
Retention and spiritual growth are the urgent goals of discipleship. This book draws on the experience of an Australian lay-led church which has a baptised member retention rate of 90%, and has planted three churches, with two more in progress. Through practical case studies, it offers tools for discipleship and small groups, so that you can retain your members and grow your church!
Zoey Ashe, suddenly in charge of the most decadent city in the world is just trying to cope with nightmarish superhuman villains, an all-seeing social network; mysterious, smooth-talking power players; and her very, very smelly cat. But when a disembowled corpse rampages through her house and accuses her of murder, Zoey has to work out what she owns, who works for her, and if she was responsible...
Fan favourite David Wong takes readers to a whole new level with this blistering sequel to the cult sensation John Dies at the End, now a movie starring Paul Giamatti. As the sequel opens, we find our heroes, David and John, again embroiled in a series of horrifying yet mind-bogglingly ridiculous events caused primarily by their own gross incompetence. The guys find that books and movies about zombies may have triggered a zombie apocalypse, despite a complete lack of zombies in the world. As they race against the clock to protect humanity from its own paranoia, they must ask themselves, who are the real monsters? Actually, that would be the shape-shifting horrors secretly taking over the world behind the scenes that, in the end, make John and Dave kind of wish it had been zombies after all. Hilarious, terrifying, engaging and wrenching, This Book Is Full of Spiders, the next thrilling installment, takes us for a wild ride with two slackers from the midwest who really have better things to do with their time than prevent the apocalypse.
From an author who consistently gives us "suspense that never stops" (James Patterson), a near-future thriller that makes your most paranoid fantasies seem like child's play. It's late Thursday night, and Inspector Ross Carver is at a crime scene in one of the city's last luxury homes. The dead man on the floor is covered by an unknown substance that's eating through his skin. Before Carver can identify it, six FBI agents burst in and remove him from the premises. He's pushed into a disinfectant trailer, forced to drink a liquid that sends him into seizures, and then is shocked unconscious. On Sunday he wakes in his bed to find his neighbor, Mia--who he's barely ever spoken to--reading aloud...
Take control of your financial future with expert guidance from wealth educators and property millionaires John Lee and Vincent Wong The Wealth Dragon Way is an essential guide to creating passive income, building property-based wealth, and achieving financial freedom. This inspiring and informative resource can help you define your financial goals and identify the steps you need to take to achieve them. Exploring common myths and misinformation surrounding wealth—such as “money is the root of all evil”—this book shows how overcoming fear and self-doubt can change the way you think about wealth and your potential for personal growth. Real-world examples illustrate how entrepreneurs c...
A guide for everyone involved in medical decision making to plot a clear course through complex and conflicting benefits and risks.
Nicholas is a profoundly lonely man, mourning the loss of a dead wife and a daughter who no longer loves him. His best and only friend is Lillie, a spirit who is always at his side. They do everything together, he just can't see her. Lillie has been Nicholas' spirit guide for a long time, and knows everything about him. She understands his pain, forgives his mistakes, and knows his wishes... and it's her job to make them come true. This novella is a spinoff of the YA series "School for Spirits," and can be enjoyed as a standalone story.
Han was contemplative. Nothing that he had seen so far answered his questions about where his mama and he came from. Who they were. He was sad for his mama, and for himself, for not only did he not know her, he didn't even know the person whom she had become. And then, what of the people that led to him? His mama's father, his mama's mother, his mama's father's father, his mama's father's mother - the list went on and on, the people he did not know, the stories they had not told him, the names that they had lost. 'No people, only ghosts here,' he whispered. Han's uneventful life in a sleepy fishing village is disturbed when a strange man arrives, asking questions about Han's mother. Han does...