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The World of Simon Rich
  • Language: en
  • Pages: 201

The World of Simon Rich

Simon Rich's BBC Radio 4 series of the same name will be broadcast in June The world is a bewildering place and we're ill-equipped to deal with it. From the horrors of childhood to the vagaries of old age, from confused people to humiliated animals, we're all just trying - and often failing - to keep it together. How carefully should you answer when asked what you'd take to a desert island? What do you do if your parents are reading your diary? How useful is a Swiss Army Knife? And what's A Brief History of Time really about? Armed with a sharp eye for the absurd and an overwhelming sense of doom, Simon Rich explores the ridiculousness of our everyday lives, from the most minute of anxieties...

Ant Farm
  • Language: en
  • Pages: 162

Ant Farm

In Ant Farm, former Harvard Lampoon president Simon Rich finds humor in some very surprising places. Armed with a sharp eye for the absurd and an overwhelming sense of doom, Rich explores the ridiculousness of our everyday lives. The world, he concludes, is a hopelessly terrifying place–with endless comic potential. –If your girlfriend gives you some “love coupons” and then breaks up with you, are the coupons still valid? –What kind of performance pressure does an endangered male panda feel when his captors bring the last remaining female panda to his cage? –If murderers can get into heaven by accepting Jesus, just how awkward is it when they run into their victims? Join Simon Rich as he explores the extraordinary and hilarious desperation that resides in ordinary life, from cradle to grave. "Hilarious." –Jon Stewart

New Teeth
  • Language: en
  • Pages: 152

New Teeth

Laugh till you cry in this new collection of stories from the award-winning “Serena Williams of humor writing” (New York Times Book Review) about raising babies and trying not to be one. Called a “comedic Godsend” by Conan O’Brien and “the Stephen King of comedy writing” by John Mulaney, Simon Rich is back with New Teeth, his funniest and most personal collection yet. Two murderous pirates find a child stowaway on board and attempt to balance pillaging with co-parenting. A woman raised by wolves prepares for her parents’ annual Thanksgiving visit. An aging mutant superhero is forced to learn humility when the mayor kicks him upstairs to a desk job. And in the hard-boiled caper “The Big Nap,” a weary two-year-old detective struggles to make sense of “a world gone mad.” Equal parts silly and sincere, New Teeth is an ode to growing up, growing older, and what it means to make a family.

Spoiled Brats (including the story that inspired the major motion picture An American Pickle starring Seth Rogen)
  • Language: en
  • Pages: 224

Spoiled Brats (including the story that inspired the major motion picture An American Pickle starring Seth Rogen)

  • Type: Book
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  • Published: 2014-10-14
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  • Publisher: Hachette UK

The "hilarious" (New York Times Book Review) collection of short stories from the award-winning humorist Simon Rich includes the story that inspired the Seth Rogen comedy An American Pickle. Twenty years ago, Barney the Dinosaur told the nation's children they were special. We're still paying the price. From "one of the funniest writers in America" comes a collection of stories culled from the front lines of the millennial culture wars (Jimmy So, Daily Beast). Rife with failing rock bands, student loans, and participation trophies, Spoiled Brats is about a generation of narcissists -- and the well-meaning boomers who made them that way. A hardworking immigrant is preserved for a century in pickle brine. A helicopter mom strives to educate her demon son. And a family of hamsters struggles to survive in a private-school homeroom. Surreal, shrewd, and surprisingly warm, these stories are as resonant as they are hilarious.

The Last Girlfriend on Earth
  • Language: en
  • Pages: 174

The Last Girlfriend on Earth

It doesn't matter if you're a caveman, a time traveller or a regular person. Sooner or later, someone's going to break your heart. The sketches in Simon Rich's new book are bizarre, funny, and - if you've ever been in love - all too familiar. From the invisible man stalking his ex, to Sherlock Holmes' only blind spot, The Last Girlfriend on Earth is always enchanting, often sweet, though occasionally awkward. Just like love itself. 'The Last Girlfriend On Earthis silly, surreal, sometimes sad and always laugh-out-loud funny. This collection will have you giggling/crying/squirming in recognition, and wondering what exactly Simon Rich has eaten to dream all this stuff up ... pulls off the tough trick of being both heart-warming and hilarious - it's a must-read if you've ever so much as had a crush on someone' Heat 'Pithy, occasionally bonkers' Time Out 'Truly hilarious' Eva Wiseman, Observer

Hits and Misses
  • Language: en
  • Pages: 168

Hits and Misses

WINNER OF THE 2019 THURBER PRIZE FOR AMERICAN HUMOR 'Genius ... Who could ask for more? You can give his books to people and just watch them laugh. Only after you've snorted through them yourself, though' Evening Standard From a bitter tell-all by a horse who made a man famous and then got left behind to a gushing magazine profile of one of your favorite World War II dictators, these stories trawl through history to skewer our obsession with fame and fortune - all the way from ancient Babylon to Hollywood. What father-to-be wouldn't feel a little jealous when his baby outstrips his success from the womb? And what happens when a film critic is forced to live in the movies he so cruelly damned? Loved in the UK by celebs, writers and readers alike, from Lauren Laverne to Matt Haig and Caitlin Moran, Simon Rich is back with his funniest and most personal collection of stories to date.

What In God's Name
  • Language: en
  • Pages: 214

What In God's Name

From the Sunsets Department and Geyser Regulation to the Department of Miracles, Heaven Inc has the earth covered. Unless someone is away from their desk. And these days, the CEO is kind of disillusioned. God knows he should be keeping an eye on the bad things happening on Earth, but instead he finds himself watching the Church channels on satellite TV. His first priority is the team of angels he's asked to get Lynyrd Skynyrd back together. Downstairs on the office floor, Eliza has been promoted from the Prayers Department to Miracles, and Craig, the only other workaholic in heaven, has to show her around. Eliza is shocked by the casual attitude of many of the angels in her new department. And she's furious when she discovers that God has never looked at, let alone answered, a single prayer. So she storms into God's office and asks Him a question that no one has ever dared to ask before. And it might just be the end of the world.

Elliot Allagash
  • Language: en
  • Pages: 220

Elliot Allagash

"Fellow high school losers, use your video game money to buy this book! Simon Rich will make you relive the dread, the hilarity, and the insanity of those formative years like no one else. Open at your own peril!"—Gary Shteyngart There are things money can’t buy: integrity, honor, discipline. Unfortunately for Seymour Herson, he’s got a more pressing matter at hand: surviving eighth grade. He’s dead last in just about everything at Glendale, the Manhattan private school his parents are working so hard to keep him in. His grades are so low a C warrants a celebration. His athletic skill is limited to how much chocolate milk he can drink in one sitting. You’d think someone with such a...

Free-Range Chickens
  • Language: en
  • Pages: 146

Free-Range Chickens

After a riotous debut collection, Ant Farm, Simon Rich returns to mine more comedy from our hopelessly terrifying world. In the nostalgic opening chapter, Rich recalls his fear of the Tooth Fairy (“Is there a face fairy?”) and his initial reaction to the “Got-your-nose” game (“Please just kill me. Better to die than to live the rest of my life as a monster”). He gets inside the heads of two firehouse Dalmatians who can’t understand their masters’ compulsion to drive off to horrible fires every day (“What the hell is wrong with these people?”). And in the final chapter, he tackles one of life’s biggest questions: Does God really have a plan for us? Yes, it turns out. Now if only He could remember what it was. . . .

Simply Rich: Life and Lessons from the Cofounder of Amway
  • Language: en
  • Pages: 304

Simply Rich: Life and Lessons from the Cofounder of Amway

In this candid autobiography, Amway cofounder Rich DeVos reflects on work, faith, family, and the core values he’s held on to, from his humble Christian upbringing through his enormous success running one of the world’s largest businesses. Few people embody the American entrepreneurial spirit as plainly as Rich DeVos. A prominent businessman, self-made billionaire, philanthropist, worldwide speaker, bestselling author, family man, and devout Christian, DeVos not only helped create Amway, one of the world’s biggest companies, but he did it from the ground up with his deep faith in God guiding the way and keeping his hopes alive. Now after the success of his bestselling books in business...