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His Banana
My new boss likes rules, but there's one nobody dares to break... No touching his banana. Seriously. The guy is like a potassium addict. Of course, I touched it. If you want to get technical, I actually put it in my mouth. I chewed it up, too... I even swallowed. I know. Bad, bad, girl. Then I saw him, and believe it or not, choking on a guy's banana does not make the best first impression. I should backtrack a little here. Before I ever touched a billionaire
Anyone But Nick
The third novel in USA Today bestselling author Penelope Bloom's Anyone But... series sizzles with a sexy and hilarious story about letting go of the past to chase the love of a lifetime. Seven years ago, I swore I'd never date Nick King. Ever. Now I'm supposed to work under him--and no, despite the way he glares like he wants to strip me bare, I mean he'll be my boss. But what better way to prove I'm really over him, right? I was a nerdy overachiever in high school, and Nick was my hopeless crush. I even laminated a note he passed to me; granted, I had a thing for laminators, but that's beside the point. Now, my only shot at getting my life back on track is to crawl to him on my knees and pray I nail the interview. Maybe I should pray that's the only thing that gets nailed in his office--especially since he looks like he wants to devour me. Nick broke my heart once. But hey, I'm still pretty handy with a laminator. Maybe I could run my heart through one before I take this job.
Anyone But Rich
From USA Today bestselling author Penelope Bloom comes the first novel in the romantic, sexy, and hilarious Anyone But... series. Seven years ago, my best friends and I made a promise: No matter what, we would never date one of the King brothers. Even if they grew up to become megafamous, gorgeous, heart-stopping billionaires. Even if they crawled on their knees and begged for forgiveness. But guess who just flew back into our lives in a private jet? And guess who just showed up to my job on my first day? Richard. King. Fortunately, it takes two seconds for Richard to reveal he hasn't changed. Conceited. Cocky. Rude. Unfortunately, he's also the kind of gorgeous that's borderline offensive--with a jawline to make statues self-conscious and a grin that short-circuits my brain. He's spent years taking what he wants. I doubt he's hungry for anything else--except me, apparently. There's no way I'll let him maneuver his way back into my life. My friends would never forgive me. I would never forgive me. But did I mention his jawline?
The Boss(hole)
There are a few things you absolutely don't do in Adrian Terranova's world. You don't question him. You don't challenge him. You don't call him by his first name. You definitely don't contradict him in front of his entire staff. Unless you're me, apparently. I'd love to say I stood up to the bosshole from hell and walked away unscathed, but that'd be a lie. First he got me fired from the job I couldn't afford to lose. Then he made sure the only position in the city I could get was working as his personal assistant. He runs his office with iron buns and icy glares. Every day is cloudy with a chance of grumpy. Every moment is a test he expects me to fail, but I'll happily disappoint him. They ...
Ulysses
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Her Cherry
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His Package
His package ended up inside my box. Calm down, perv. My mailbox.As soon as I saw what was inside, I knew two things: It belonged to my hot neighbor, and he had a dirty secret. Normally, I was more of a cat person. As in, if I had to choose who lives,
Anyone But Cade
The second novel in USA Today bestselling author Penelope Bloom's Anyone But... series turns up the heat and hilarity with a story about second chances and promises worth breaking. After Cade King cost me everything, I vowed I'd never fall for him again--even if he became rich and megafamous. Now he's back, and he's still the embodiment of a big, shiny red button. Everybody knows you shouldn't touch red buttons, but it's so, so hard to resist. I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy it a little when I arrested him for disorderly conduct. Unfortunately, I think Cade liked it a little too. So when he asks for my help raising the son he just found out about, I know exactly what to say: "No, you stupidly sexy red button. I won't touch you, even to help a cute little kid." You're damn right that's what I said. Mostly. Still, Cade doesn't know the first thing about commitment. He lives completely in the moment. I'd need to have a recurring case of amnesia to believe he could change, even for his son. Or me.
The Golden Pecker
First impression of Landon Collins?Questionable. Highly questionable.He needed to take me to see "The Golden Pecker".Fortunately, it was in the basement, not his pants.Turns out my late grandfather was running a BDSM club.I know what you're thinking. Don't follow a stranger into the basement. More importantly, absolutely don't follow strangers who want to show you their "golden peckers."But I might have literally died of curiosity if I passed this up. Sure, there was a chance of murder, abduction, and all sorts of horror. Then again, living with the endless questions would be its own special kind of hell. What kind of self-respecting man calls it a pecker? And what did all of this have to do with my late grandfather's will?The other problem was I couldn't be sure if Landon Collins was plotting my murder, or if he just had resting hot guy face - broody eyes, a sharp jaw, and full lips made for cruel smiles.Was I ignoring a few dozen red flags? Absolutely. But last time I checked, curiosity was only notorious for killing cats. So I followed his firm ass straight to The Golden Pecker.
Her Bush
Everything went wrong when I trimmed his bush. And no, it's not what you're thinking. I'm a professional.The client hired me to trim a bush in his garden for a party.I accidentally turned it into something that rhymes with "a big rock and walls".Imagine my surprise when the art world decides it's a masterpiece.Were my raging hormones the cause of my bush sculpting blunder? I mean, who would blame me if they were? After meeting Harry Barnidge for the first time, my brain went straight to cavewoman mode. There were undignified fantasies of being bashed over the head and carried off to a cave, a significant loss of vocabulary, and maybe even a little drooling.But I can't focus on that. On him I...
