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Merde in Europe
One Brit in Brussels. Two French Women. And a whole lot of merde. The hilarious new novel from Stephen Clarke, bestselling author of A Year in the Merde and A Thousand Years of Annoying the French. Does Brussels really want to outlaw bingo, bagpipes and smoky bacon crisps? Are eurocrats trying to rename the English Channel? And can the ink in euro notes really make men impotent? No. Well, not exactly. But it is true that the EU is a seriously flawed institution. And it's about to become even more so as Englishman Paul West goes to Brussels to work for a French MEP, and gets an insider's view of what really goes on in the massive madhouse that is the EU Parliament. As Britain prepares to vote whether it stays in or exits the EU, Paul gets the chance to influence the result of the referendum. He has to decide: better the devil you know? Or bring on the Brexit? It's a decision that could cost him a lot more than his euro paypacket . . .
The Merde Factor
Englishman Paul West is living the Parisian dream, and doing his best not to annoy the French. But recently things have been going très wrong: He's stuck in an apartment so small that he has to cut his baguettes in two to fit them in the kitchen. His research into authentic French cuisine is about to cause a national strike - and it could be all his fault. His Parisian business partner is determined to close their tea-room. And thinks that sexually harrassing his female employees is a basic human right. And Paul's gorgeous ex-girlfriend seems to be stalking him. Threatened with eviction, unemployment and bankrupcy, Paul realises that his personal merde factor is about to hit the fan...
Merde Actually
A year after arriving in France, Englishman Paul West is still struggling with some fundamental questions: _________________ What is the best way to scare a gendarme? Why are there no health warnings on French nudist beaches? And is it really polite to sleep with your boss's mistress? In his second comedy of errors, Paul West opens an English tearoom, and mutates (temporarily) into a Parisian waiter. Meanwhile, he continues his search for the perfect French mademoiselle. But will Paul find l'amour éternel, or will it all end in merde? Author's apology: 'I'd just like to say sorry to all the suppository fans out there, because in this book there are no suppositories. There are, however, lots of courgettes, and I see this as progress. Suppositories to courgettes - I think it proves that I'm developing as a writer.' Stephen Clarke
Merde Happens
Paul West is in deep financial merde. His only way out of debt is to accept a decidedly dodgy job: _________________ It involves him touring America in a Mini, while pretending to be typically British. Also in the car is Paul's French girlfriend, Alexa, and his American poet friend, Jake, whose main aim in life is to sleep with a woman from every country in the world. Preferably in the back of Paul's Mini. But as the little car battles from New York to Miami, leg-room turns out to be the least of Paul's troubles. His work is being sabotaged, his tour plans are in tatters, and his love life becomes a Franco-American war zone. And as Paul knows better than anyone, when you mix love and war - merde happens...
The Hidden Keys to Life and Business Success
The world is constantly evolving and you must be ready to jump into the driver's seat to brand yourself and steer your own life. This book provides simple, yet effective practices anyone can implement to become take-charge, self branding, empowered professional or just a plain everyday hardworking citizen; Learning how to shake hands to influence others, when is the best time to ask for donations or help for a project or how to identify a great mentor are some of the hidden gems you will discover. After reading The Hidden Keys to Life and Business Success you will feel excited about branding yourself and improving your career satisfaction and personal brand goals. Here's what book reviews ar...
A Year In The Merde
What are the French really like? Paul West, a young Englishman arriving in Paris to start a new job, is about to find out. _________________ They do eat a lot of cheese, some of which smells like pigs’ droppings. They don’t wash their armpits with garlic soap. Going on strike really is the second national participation sport after petanque. And, yes, they do use suppositories. Less quaint than A Year in Provence, less chocolatey than Chocolat, A Year in the Merde will tell you how to get served by the grumpiest Parisian waiter; how to make perfect vinaigrette every time; how to make amour - not war; and how not to buy a house in the French countryside.
When the Money Runs Out
An eminent economist warns that Western nations’ economic expectations for the future are way out of sync with the realities of economic stagnation and stringent steps will be required to avoid massive political and economic upheaval. “It is alarmingly difficult to disagree with Stephen King. All one can say, perhaps, is that one of the great errors of human nature—strongly displayed before the credit crunch—is the belief that a prevailing trend will continue indefinitely. The crunch is surely a reminder that what goes up must come down.”—Charles Moore, Daily Telegraph “[King] is dabbling in the financial equivalent of the horror genre. Perhaps even scarier, his is the stuff of nonfiction.”—Michael J. Casey, Wall Street Journal
Dial M For Merde
Paul West has just received an offer he can't refuse: _________________ Two weeks in the sun. All expenses paid. With a beautiful blonde called Gloria Monday. But it soon becomes obvious that Gloria, or M as she likes to be known, has bigger fish to fry. Meanwhile Paul is asked to cater his best friend’s wedding. Cooking for the French is a risky assignment at the best of times, but Paul assures the bride that nothing can go wrong. Or can it? When Paul discovers that M's real target is the French president, and that he's coming to Elodie's wedding, he realises that the merde is about to hit the fan...
Understanding Paul
Two thousand years later, Paul attracts more attention than any other figure from antiquity besides one," writes Stephen Westerholm. Why the fascination with the apostle Paul? Westerholm explains that Paul remains such a compelling figure because he was "a man completely captivated by a particular way of looking at life." Using the themes of the Epistle to the Romans, Westerholm helps readers understand the major components of Paul's vision of life. He delves into the writings of the Old Testament, explores their influence on Paul, and engages contemporary readers in a thought-provoking reconsideration of their own assumptions about faith, theology, and ethics. This insightful introduction gives postmodern readers, especially those with little or no biblical background, a necessary big-picture look at Paul's view of reality.
The Spirit Engineer
Belfast, 1914. Two years after the sinking of the Titanic, high society has become obsessed with spiritualism. In their collective grief they are attempting to reach their departed through séances. William Jackson Crawford is a man of science and a sceptic, but one night with everyone sitting around the circle, voices come to him seemingly from beyond the veil, placing doubt in his heart and a seed of obsession in his mind. Could the spirits truly be communicating with him or is this one of Kathleen's parlour tricks gone too far? Based on the true story of William Jackson Crawford and famed medium Kathleen Goligher, and with a cast of characters that includes Arthur Conan Doyle and Harry Houdini, West conjures a haunting tale that will keep you guessing until the end.
