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Bill the Vampire
There are reasons we fear the night. He isn't one of them. Bill Ryder was a dateless dweeb...then he died. Unfortunately for him that was just the beginning of his troubles. He awoke to find himself a vampire, one of the legendary predators of the night. Unfortunately for him, he was still at the bottom of the food chain. Now he finds himself surrounded by creatures stronger, deadlier and a whole lot cooler than he is. Worst yet, they all want him dead...permanently this time. Bill isn't exactly average, though. A vampire like him hasn't been seen in centuries. He's got a few tricks up his sleeve, unlikely allies, and an attitude problem that makes him too damn obnoxious to quit. Join him in this hilarious tale of monsters, mayhem, and the unlikely hero who's not afraid to tell them all off...even if it gets his teeth kicked in. ********** Bill the Vampire (the Tome of Bill, part 1) is 80k words of foul-mouthed horror comedy by Rick Gualtieri, author of Scary Dead Things (The Tome of Bill, part 2) and Bigfoot Hunters.
The Wicked Dead
There are reasons we fear the night. Now he must become one of them. Bill Ryder has a powerful destiny. He just never expected it to involve an amnesiac bloodsucker, a bunch of D&D dorks, and a hormonal witch. It's time for the gamer, geek, and legendary vampire to embrace his fate. Ordered to storm the vampire stronghold in Boston, Bill must approach the doorstep of the invincible undead warlord he's destined to face. It's his only chance of stopping Armageddon. As his enemies stand in his way and his allies falter, the vicious beast inside of him wants out. If he stands tall and faces his fate, the world might just have a chance of surviving. If he fails, an unquenchable evil will destroy everything Bill knows and loves. Why can't the end of the world ever be easy?
Carnage À Trois
One geek trapped in a lethal love triangle Bill Ryder's past and present are about to collide. His girlfriend's been marked for death by the immortal temptress who wants him. One's a witch and the other's a vampire, which means the chances of them talking out their problems over tea are slim to none. It's bad enough Bill's too distracted by evil leprechauns and redneck werewolves to put a stop to it, but now something massive has been spotted prowling the waters of the Hudson - a harbinger of biblical proportions, forewarning of dark times to come. With a tidal wave of chaos closing in, Bill will need to choose between his friends, his feelings, and the fate of the world. Sadly, there's little hope of saving everyone he holds dear from the carnage that's about to punch him and his love life right in the moby dick.
Half a Prayer
Terror lurks below and it's about to surface. The end of the world is rapidly approaching, but Bill Ryder - gamer, geek, and legendary vampire - finds himself with more pressing concerns to worry about: the women in his life. Sidelined from action, he's forced to reevaluate his feelings. Sadly for him, it's a luxury he can ill afford. An unstoppable terror from the dawn of time has awoken deep beneath the Earth and is headed his way. To make matters worse, he's been deemed a traitor by those he thought to be his allies. Now he finds himself fighting off enemies from all sides while warring with his emotions. Talk about sucky timing for introspection. As the world crumbles to pieces around him, Bill must muster his courage, master his powers, and rise to the destiny he's been trying so long to deny - because if he doesn't, his love life will be the least of his worries. *** Half-a-Prayer (the Tome of Bill, part 6) is 130k words of foul-mouthed Urban Fantasy by Rick Gualtieri, author of Holier Than Thou and Sunset Strip
Planet Property
Planet Property details the inner workings of the UK commercial property, residential development, and rental markets. The book provides a plain-English explanation of how Planet Property spins.
Scary Dead Things
There are reasons we fear the night. He STILL isn't one of them. Bill Ryder, the trash-talking undead geek from Bill the Vampire, is back and about to find himself in a whole new world of side-splitting insanity. One of the most powerful vampires on the planet has given Bill a death sentence. Meanwhile, an immortal princess wants him for an entirely different purpose, one which makes his first issue seem almost preferable. All the while, new and powerful forces have begun to emerge from the shadows around him. Are they friend or foe? Knowing his luck, do you even have to ask? Bill's only hope is to marshal his friends, master his powers, and somehow prove that he's the scariest dead thing of them all. ********** Scary Dead Things (The Tome of Bill, part 2) is 80,000 words of foul-mouthed horror comedy by Rick Gualtieri, author of Bill the Vampire and Bigfoot Hunters.
The Big Bad Book of Bill Murray
New York Times bestseller! This fun-loving celebration of Bill Murray offers a behind-the-scenes peek into the actor’s life and career—from films like Groundhog Day to his serial “photobombing”—with over 75 photos. Part biography, part critical appreciation, part love letter—and all fun—this enormous full-color volume, packed with color film stills and behind-the-scenes photography, chronicles every Murray performance in loving detail, recounting all the milestones, legendary “Murray stories,” and controversies in the life of this enigmatic performer. He’s played a deranged groundskeeper, a bellowing lounge singer, a paranormal exterminator, and a grouchy weatherman. He i...
Pleased to Meet Me
Why are you attracted to a certain "type?" Why are you a morning person? Why do you vote the way you do? From a witty new voice in popular science comes a life-changing look at what makes you you. "I can't believe I just said that." "What possessed me to do that?" "What's wrong with me?" We're constantly seeking answers to these fundamental human questions, and now, science has the answers. Clever, relatable, and revealing, this eye-opening narrative from Indiana University School of Medicine professor Bill Sullivan explores why we do the things we do through the lens of genetics, microbiology, psychology, neurology, and family history. From what we love (and hate) to eat and who we vote for...
Strange Days
At the edge of chaos, one geek stands tall. Five years ago, dateless dork Bill Ryder somehow saved the world, banishing magic and monsters to the shadows. He thought it was over, that he was finished with that life. Too bad for him, shit's about to get surreal again. Now the impossible has happened. His goddaughter is conjuring fireballs from thin air and two vampires have shown up at his doorstep looking to kick his ass. A crazed group of ex-wizards are hell-bent on forcing the door between worlds open, intent on letting the nightmares back in, and only Bill and his friends stand in their way. Join him in this hilarious tale of a world teetering on the brink of anarchy and the unlikely hero who's not afraid to look the madness in the eye and flip it both fingers.
Scary Dead Things
There are reasons we fear the night.He STILL isn't one of them.Bill Ryder: programmer, gamer, and legendary vampire is back! Six months have passed since a vampire hottie named Sally dragged him kicking and screaming (but mostly screaming) into the supernatural underworld. Since then he's found himself hounded by enemies and frustrated by his allies. All that and he still can't work up the nerve to talk to his dream girl. Little does he know his troubles are just starting.A chance meeting halfway across the world plunges Bill into more insanity than he can shake a stick at. Now he finds himself a marked man in more ways than one. One of the most powerful immortals in the world wants him dead...
