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“Anyone grappling with the bewilderment of midlife…will be at once provoked and comforted by this enormously wise book” (Dani Shapiro, New York Times bestselling author of Hourglass: Time, Memory, Marriage), from a psychologist who has worked for decades with people struggling to preserve and enhance their marriages and long-term relationships. People today are trying to make their marriages work over longer lives than ever before. But staying married isn’t always easy. In the brilliant, transformative, and optimistic The Rough Patch, clinical psychologist Daphne de Marneffe explores the extraordinary pushes and pulls of midlife marriage, where our need to develop as individuals can ...
Esteemed psychologist Daphne de Marneffe examines women’s desire to care for children in an updated reissue of her “fascinating analysis that’s a welcome addition to the dialogues about motherhood” (Publishers Weekly). If a century ago it was women’s sexual desires that were unspeakable, today it is the female desire to mother that has become taboo. One hundred years of Freud and feminism have liberated women to acknowledge and explore their sexual selves, as well as their public and personal ambitions. What has remained inhibited is women’s thinking about motherhood. Maternal Desire is the first book to treat women’s desire to mother as a legitimate focus of intellectual inqui...
Living together can be a struggle. Children grow up, jobs change and the things that used to make us happy don't necessarily work anymore. Relationships can lose their shine. In The Rough Patch Daphne de Marneffe shows us a way through these potentially difficult years to a life lived with integrity, vitality and love. She offers us seasoned wisdom on the psychological, emotional and relational capacities we need in order to overcome our problems as individuals and as couples. Every reader will find himself or herself in these pages. Blending research, interviews and clinical experience, de Marneffe covers the key problems that challenge us in midlife with wit and warmth. The Rough Patch, for all its pain and bewilderment, presents an opportunity - to know ourselves, to expand our scope, to grow, and to grow up. 'Anyone in any relationship at any stage of life could stand to learn from the wisdom in these pages' Andrew Solomon
This book analyzes Nancy Chodorow’s canonical book The Reproduction of Mothering, bringing together an original essay from Nancy Chodorow and a host of outstanding international scholars—including Rosemary Balsam, Adrienne Harris, Elizabeth Abel, Madelon Sprengnether, Ilene Philipson, Meg Jay, Daphne de Marneffe, Alison Stone and Petra Bueskens—in a mix of memoir, festschrift, reflection, critical analysis and new directions in Chodorowian scholarship. In the 40 years since its publication, The Reproduction of Mothering has had a profound impact on scholarship across many disciplines including sociology, psychoanalysis, psychology, ethics, literary criticism and women’s and gender studies. Organized as a “reproduction of mothering scholarship”, this volume adopts a generationally differentiated structure weaving personal, political and scholarly essays. This book will be of interest to scholars across the social sciences and humanities. It will bring Nancy Chodorow and her canonical work to a new generation showcasing classic and contemporary Chodorowian scholarship.
Theory on mothers, mothering and motherhood has emerged as a distinct body of knowledge within Motherhood Studies and Feminist Theory more generally. This collection, The Second Edition of Maternal Theory: Essential Readings introduces readers to this rich and diverse tradition of maternal theory. Composed of 60 chapters the 2nd edition includes two sections: the first with the classic texts by Adrienne Rich, Nancy Chodorow, Sara Ruddick, Alice Walker, Barbara Katz Rothman, bell hooks, Sharon Hays, Patricia Hill-Collins, Audre Lorde, Daphne de Marneffe, Judith Warner, Patrice diQinizio, Susan Maushart, and many more. The second section includes thirty new chapters on vital and new topics inc...
Mixed feelings about motherhood—uncertainty over having a child, fears of pregnancy and childbirth, or negative thoughts about one’s own children—are not just hard to discuss, they are a powerful social taboo. In this beautifully written book, Barbara Almond brings this troubling issue to light. She uncovers the roots of ambivalence, tells how it manifests in lives of women and their children, and describes a spectrum of maternal behavior—from normal feelings to highly disturbed mothering. In a society where perfection in parenting is the unattainable ideal, this compassionate book also shows how women can affect positive change in their lives.
With a focus on self-empowerment and resilience, this refreshing and witty relationship guide has a reassuring counterintuitive message for unhappy spouses: you only need one partner to initiate far-reaching positive change in a marriage. Conventional wisdom says that “it takes two” to turn a troubled marriage around and that both partners must have a shared commitment to change. So when couples can’t agree on how—or whether—to make their marriage better, many give up or settle for a less-than-satisfying marriage (or think the only way out is divorce). Fortunately, there is an alternative. “What distinguishes Reilly’s book is that she says a warring couple don’t have to agree...
Becoming a mother is a joyful rite of passage, but it can also bring overwhelming emotional upheaval, exhaustion, and self-doubt. And is it any wonder? Motherhood changes everything, right down to a woman's brain chemistry. No one understands "mom brain" better than psychologist Ilyse Dobrow DiMarco, a mother of two herself who specializes in treating women with young children. In this compassionate guide, Dr. Dobrow DiMarco shares science-based psychological strategies to help moms cope with common challenges and make peace with their transformed identity. Candid, witty stories from her own life and the lives of women she has worked with illustrate ways to tame self-critical thoughts; navigate the "new normal" of work, marriage, and friendships; and mindfully accept the highs and lows of parenting--even in the toughest moments.
Hard to Get is a powerful and intimate examination of the sex and love lives of the most liberated women in history—twenty-something American women who have had more opportunities, more positive role models, and more information than any previous generation. Drawing from her years of experience as a researcher and a psychotherapist, Leslie C. Bell takes us directly into the lives of young women who struggle to negotiate the complexities of sexual desire and pleasure, and to make sense of their historically unique but contradictory constellation of opportunities and challenges. In candid interviews, Bell’s subjects reveal that, despite having more choices than ever, they face great uncertainty about desire, sexuality, and relationships. Ground-breaking and highly readable, Hard to Get offers fascinating insights into the many ways that sex, love, and satisfying relationships prove surprisingly elusive to these young women as they navigate the new emotional landscape of the 21st century.
“Anyone grappling with the bewilderment of midlife…will be at once provoked and comforted by this enormously wise book” (Dani Shapiro, New York Times bestselling author of Hourglass: Time, Memory, Marriage), from a psychologist who has worked for decades with people struggling to preserve and enhance their marriages and long-term relationships. People today are trying to make their marriages work over longer lives than ever before. But staying married isn’t always easy. In the brilliant, transformative, and optimistic The Rough Patch, clinical psychologist Daphne de Marneffe explores the extraordinary pushes and pulls of midlife marriage, where our need to develop as individuals can ...