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You Might Just Make It Out of This Alive
"Garrett Cook truly amazes me. His imagination is mind-blowing, his prose sings like the sweetest discombobulated sirens, and no matter how far out or strange his stories may get, he has the magical ability to make it all work. To somehow make it all logical." "-Trent Zelazny, author of To Sleep Gently" "There's no way to prepare, no way to protect yourself. Garrett Cook's work has an edge...and it's at your throat." "-Robert Dunbar, Bram Stoker nominee, author of Martyrs and Monsters" "Garrett Cook and Jimmy Plush ain't fluff. Raw and uncut, dealin' out death to the offensive, they preach sledgehammer when they drop hardcore in hardboiled" "-Joseph S. Pulver, Sr., Editor of A Season in Carc...
Charcoal
Thomas Kemp, the Libertine, turned cruelty, torture and humiliation into works of art. It was said that he had given his soul to something inhuman to be part of artistic immortality. It was said that his very ashes were used to make a set of charcoals still imbued with his spirit. When Shannon Hernandez, a traumatized and repressed art student, is tasked to draw with them by her lecherous professor, she feels a change in herself and something menacing calling out to her. She is offered a chance to create work that breaks boundaries and hearts alike but comes bound with a connection to a legacy of immortal terrors.
Sweet Silver Blues
It should have been a simple job. But for Garrett, a human detective in a world of gnomes, tracking down the woman to whom his dead pal Danny left a fortune in silver is no slight task. Even with the aid of Morley, the toughest half-elf around, Garrett isn't sure he'll make it out alive from a land where magic can be murder, the dead still talk, and vampires are always hungry for human blood.
Crisis Boy
From the Wonderland Book Award-winning twisted mind behind A God of Hungry Walls, Garrett Cook, comes the most offensive and inappropriate book yet released by the leading publisher of extreme horror, Deadite Press. The news is a lie. The conspiracies are real. We all see the constant reports of mass shootings in the United States. Footage of death and panic and random citizens being massacred by terrorists or crazies. But what the viewers at home don't see are the agendas these attacks are pushing or that those "victims" are trained actors paid to be a part of the scene. They are "crisis actors." John is a "Crisis Boy," created by the secret organizations that really pull the strings behind...
Archelon Ranch
"Archelon Ranch is a metafictional thrill ride on a wild gilawalrus, as merciless in its critique of narrative privilege as it is to its characters. Pay your money, take your chance, keep your concept of the self inside the vehicle at all times. The management is not responsible for personae that are lost or mangled."Scott Nicolay, World Fantasy Award Winner, author of Ana Kai TangataJe ne suis pas un chapeau. Je suis un homme... In an overgrown, primeval, jungle-city state, Bernard is a test subject for science experiments. His father and Professor Sagramour have been injecting him with hallucinogenic mud and reality affirming drugs so that one day man will be immune to the insanity inducin...
Murderland
~ Jeremy Jenkins is a pharmacist living a nightmare. ~America has made serial killing provisionally legal. What was once a crime is now a game. Juvenile delinquent Reapkids dressed as history's deadliest murderers roam the streets causing chaos. Cannibal Godless Jack Cavanagh is on every morning show. And Jeremy's girlfriend Cass, the love of his life, can't get enough of it. Could be worse. Creatures from another dimension could be infiltrating ours getting our women pregnant. He could live with the guilt of being history's most prolific serial killer. The fate of a world not worth saving could rest on his broad shoulders. Maybe they are. Maybe he is. Maybe it does.
Introducing Garrett, P.I.
"The first three novels from the classic series that brought 'a dose of gritty realism to fantasy.' Being a human detective in a world of gnomes, trolls, and damsels in distress is no easy task, but when trouble comes knocking, Garrett is always the man for the job."--Page 4 of cover.
Jimmy Plush, Teddy Bear Detective
In a city ridden with prostitute furries, cannibal cops and warehouse-sized mob bosses, I've got my work cut out for me. My name is Jimmy Plush. I'm a private detective. I'm also a teddy bear. It all started when the original Jimmy Plush entered my life, offering to take my gambling debts away if I agreed to switch bodies with him. But I didn't know that being a three-foot-high plush toy would be such a living hell, especially now that everyone in town wants a piece of me. All I've gotten out of this deal is a faithful Chinese chauffeur, a custom teddybear .45, and a girlfriend who won't take off the fox suit she turns tricks in. Now I've got to keep this town clean and try to track down the real Jimmy Plush without losing my stuffing for good. Only one thing is for sure: Life is hard when you're soft. Jimmy Plush, Teddy Bear Detective is a high octane pulp satire. In the tradition of Sam Spade, The Shadow, Dick Tracy, Hellboy and Howard the Duck comes a new kind of hero, a hero that reminds us that the measure of a man is in his guts and his gun.
Sex and Drugs and Sausage Rolls
He becomes funnier the more you read him.' Independent It has always been John Omally's secret ambition to become a rock star. In his youth he mastered air guitar and wardrobe-mirror posing, but he lacked that certain something. Talent. But at last an opportunity has arisen for John to get into 'The Industry'. A band called Gandhi's Hairdryer are looking for a manager, so all John has to do is persuade them that he is the new Brian Epstein. It should be a piece of cake. But - and there's always a but - there is something rather odd about this band. Something other-worldly. It might be the lead singer, whose voice has the power to heal. Might she be an angel, perhaps? Or could she be the Devil in disguise? Because, after all, the Devil does have all the best tunes. And this is Brentford. In this, his final offering of the twentieth century, Robert Rankin returns to the town of his birth, the friends of his youth and one of the loves of his life: Rock Music. 'Everybody should read at least one Robert Rankin in their life.' Daily Express
Red Iron Nights
Blood-soaked blades have been taking their toll among the luscious lovelies in Garrett’s home city of TunFaire. And though Garrett can be as civic-minded as the next guy—unless the next guy is Captain Block of the Watch—the private eye isn’t sure he really wants to take on a serial killer psycho who does too good a carving job and never leaves any of the blood behind. Still, having Block pay him for his services with lots of ill-gotten government funds, and having his own partner, the Dead Man, strenuously urge him to take the case, prove an irresistible combination for Garrett. And so he begins a search that would take him from the lowest slums to the highest estates, from confrontations with magic-spitting enemies to run-ins with the king of crime’s wayward daughter, to a final encounter with an ancient evil that has once again been loosed on his unsuspecting town.
