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Beat the Banks!
Banks make their money from our money; it's the nature of their business. They profit from our ignorance by selling us 'products' we don't actually need and have a vested interest in keeping us in the dark. Jasmine's no-nonsense, practical advice will help you to: - Make the most of your savings and watch your money grow - Get free money from the government by using up your ISA allowance - Pay off your mortgage quickly, even though the banks don't want you to - Invest in stocks and shares the cheap and easy way - Ensure a safe and profitable retirement by choosing the right pension So, it's time to fire your bank manager, beat the banks at their own game and ensure the profits end up in your pocket, not theirs!
The Little Book of Abuse
You've got clowns to the left of you, jokers to the right and you're stuck in the middle unable to shut them up. Well now you can with all the put-doen lines and smart comebacks in this book. If you're all stressed out and you've no one to choke, pick a line and use it next time you feel like you're just flypaper for freaks. You'll find put-downs for men: 'I'm not your type. I have a pulse'; put-downs for women: 'Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?', and put-downs for any fool using up your air on this planet: ' I don't know what your problem is, but I'II bet it's hard to pronounce'. Warning: Next mood swing: 6 minutes.
The Little Book of More Abuse
So there you are, gorgeous, gifted and a brain the size of a planet and what do you have to put up with? Idiots, morons and people so ugly they ought to have a license to go outside. What should you do? Smile sweetly and put up with them? Gaze into the middle distance and talk about the weather? No. Put them right, sort them out and let them know where they really stand in the food chain of life. Pick any of the pithy put-downs in this little book and you'll never need to be nice to anyone ever again. This Little Book of Abuse: for life's little annoyances.... and their parents. 'The wheel's spinning but the hamster's dead' 'Next time you cross the road, don't look' 'Of course you're special. You went to a special school right?'
The Money Magpie
Packed full of practical financial advice & money-saving ideas, 'The Money Magpie' shows readers how to spend less, make more & invest what's left over, even in hard times. Based on this key idea, Jasmine explains how to get the best deals on utilities, credit cards & food, & how to assess & manage finances using easy-to-follow techniques.
Money Magpie
Jasmine Birtles believes that anyone can be better off, she just needs to show you how... Packed full of practical financial advice and brilliant money-saving ideas,The Money Magpieshows you how to spend less, make more and invest what's left over, even in hard times. Based on this key idea, Jasmine tells you how to: - be the King or Queen of cash by getting the best deals on utilities, credit cards and food - assess and manage your finances with clear, easy-to-follow techniques - make more money instantly using what you have already - work out a long term plan for increasing wealth that fits into your lifestyle With handy links to Jasmine's fast-growing website www.moneymagpie.com, and the use of self-assessment quizzes, brilliantly simple advice and ideas that mould around the way you live,The Money Magpiewill teach you how to be rich, whatever your situation.
Arse
From J-Lo to Kylie, the arse is now subject to scrutiny as never before. This mini book includes celebrity arses, bum pick-up lines, a history of great and worthy arses, the best bum jokes ever, and much much more.
A Bit on the Side
Fun and informative guide to earning extra money on the side Everyone would like to earn some extra money on top of their usual job, and this book will show you the myriad different ways in which it can be done. Did you know you could earn extra cash by selling your hair, or taking part in police line-ups? Every chapter will be full of suggestions for money-making schemes - either by selling things, by using your hobbies and creative skills, or working in the evenings. There are also many ways of making money by saving money. The book gives the pros and cons of each activity, together with guidance on tax.
The Little Book of Excuses
Ever been caught with your trousers down (literally or metaphorically) and needed a good excuse? Look no further, A Little Book of Excuses will have excuses to cover every situation: 'I can't come in to work today because I'm stalking my ex-boss who fired me for not showing up for work.' 'I've used up all my sick days... so I'm calling in dead.' 'She meant nothing to me.... other than a night of wild passion that i will remember to the end of my days and against which i will measure all other women.'
The Money Book
Jasmine Birtles tells readers everything they need to know about making money and keeping it. It combines secrets of thinking rich with practical advice and tips and will appeal to people with varying financial acumen.
A Woman's Little Instruction Book
A humorous little book of secrets to help you sort out the men in your life -- and the life in your menEver since Eve handed Adam that apple, women everywhere have been mystified by what it is exactly that makes men what they are. Packed with handy hints and helpful tips, A Woman's Little Instruction Book grasps this fruit and squeezes till the pips squeak. What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door. The only reason men are on this planet is because vibrators can't dance or buy drinks. You will find everything you need to know about a man in his pants drawer. A man who thinks you should be thinner, and tells you so, should be operated on without an anaesthetic.
